Not so Happy Endings!

We go to the worst massage parlors in town so you don’t have to.
Jasmin-aarhus.dk
This is more of a daytime spa for senior citizens.  The staff is older then average and are quick to talk you into the 1 hour massage special.  The rub down was quite painful and we left in more pain then when we came in. Do not expect any special treatment here. This is not the place where you whip out your Johnson.
Chaba-thaimassage
Staff varies from young to old, depends on which day.  Separate room with shower, place resembles a Thai restaurant kitchen, but the service is good enough so no need to complain.  Depending on the chemistry anything goes for the right price.
Siam Massage
This is by far the worst parlor out of all the ones we went to.   There is just 2 mattresses on the floor with a curtain separating you from another dude getting his nut off.  Make sure you ask for the special to get a decent girl if not you will just get a regular massage from an elderly mamasan with a beer belly.  Not a pretty sight, unless you’re into that sort of thing. 
Saimai Massage
At first we questioned the masseuse’s gender but all was cleared up when she took her clothes off. Massage was decent on a bed with a curtain on the side.  Friendly staff that is willing to please, goes the extra length to provide a great service.
Star-Massage
This is another one to avoid.  Elderly staff that wasn’t friendly at all.  After a few minutes we told them to stop. The massage was horrible and we knew it wasn’t going to lead into anything special. Not worth it. 
Dejlina Thai Massage 
The place is kind of rough with just a mattress.  But a decent massage either way.  Staff is a little older but nothing over 50. Depending on the chemistry you should be able to walk away with a smile on your face.
Miin Thaimassage
This place has by far the prettiest girl we have ever seen. The room is just a mattress on the floor but one can guess you are not there just for the massage. The masseuse seemed bored during the session, but made up for it in the end.  Be careful of the foreplay, her fingers do wonder around in unexpected places.
Pi Mek’s Thai Massage & Spa Center
A private room with a small bed. Make sure to ask for the younger staff. Not the best massage we got but at least we were offered extra services at the end. In all a decent place to go to on a rainy day.
Arunratsamee Thaimassage
Private room with a small bed.  Staff a little old but was very friendly. Nice oil massage with good technique.  Masseuse goes out of the way to put in extra work for a great experience
PP Thaimassage
Place was booked when we got there, but the staff looked decent. Maybe worth checking out.